PCOS, Recurrent Loss & Male Factor Infertility: Jordan’s Story [SUCCESS]

May 25, 2020

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Today’s success story is about a woman named Jordan. She is a 29-year-old cloud solutions architect who enjoys creating YouTube content, cross-stitching, and playing video games. Jordan’s period returned about 8 months after she married her husband. However, her period lasted 25 days. Her OB/GYN diagnosed her with PCOS. Several attempts at inducing ovulation didn’t work, so they moved on to a fertility clinic. Her husband was diagnosed with male factor, although they were told that it wasn’t their main problem. A combination of Femara, Gonal-F, and progesterone resulted in her first pregnancy. However, the heartbeat stopped at about 8 weeks, and she had a D&C. At that point, she launched her YouTube channel to educate women about infertility. Two more medicated cycles were unsuccessful, but she became pregnant spontaneously, only to miscarry at 10 weeks. Join us to hear how Jordan and her husband pursued IVF and adoption at the same time and ultimately adopted their daughter.

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What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • Before infertility, Jordan was extremely goal-oriented and had everything planned out for her life
  • How Jordan met her husband in high school, and they started dating just before graduation
  • As a couple, they are extremely honest with each other, and they balance each other out
  • How Jordan wanted the mother/child relationship but took it seriously when they started trying the first time
  • How they bought a house to fit their family with kids, and Jordan stayed in a specific job for the family-friendly benefits
  • After her final birth control shot, they married, but her cycle didn’t return for several months, and then she had a 25-day period
  • She saw her OB and was diagnosed with PCOS at age 25; she took Metformin and lost 20 lbs.
  • When she was prescribed more medications but still wasn’t ovulating, her OB referred her to a reproductive endocrinologist
  • When the RE did testing, Jordan had textbook PCOS symptoms, and her husband’s sperm analysis was less than terrific
  • How Jordan took Femara, Gonal-F, and progesterone and got pregnant; at the first ultrasound, the baby’s heartbeat was borderline, and then came to a stop over the next couple of weeks, which resulted in a D&C
  • Why Jordan started a YouTube channel to be an outlet to help her cope and to educate others
  • After two more unsuccessful hybrid cycles, Jordan’s mother was diagnosed with cancer, so they took a break and went on vacation
  • Surprisingly, Jordan got pregnant spontaneously, but her bloodwork and ultrasound were questionable
  • They announced the pregnancy, but there was no heartbeat at the ten-week ultrasound; Jordan had a second D & C
  • Why Jordan wanted to have a D & C with both miscarriages to get the genetic results; they learned that both babies had trisomy disorders
  • How the timing of the genetic results coincided with the due date for Jordan’s first pregnancy and led to several months of depression for her
  • How they made plans to move forward with the RE; a recurrent loss panel helped them clarify their main goal, which was to become parents
  • How they pursued infant adoption and began the home study and paperwork process, but prepared for IVF at the same time while they had good insurance coverage
  • The egg retrieval yielded 33 eggs, 19 of which fertilized, but it was devastating to get only three PGS-normal embryos
  • How they met with a prospective birth mother, but she didn’t choose them; why this was devastating to them because they had gotten their hopes up
  • The good news from the social worker that they’d been picked by another birth mother
  • They met the birth mother and got to know her, they were chosen to adopt the baby, and their daughter was born a few weeks later
  • Why Jordan began with her Ob-gyn before going to a fertility clinic
  • Jordan’s first impression of the fertility clinic with a doctor who was not warm and cuddly, but was exactly what Jordan wanted in her doctor
  • How the Beat Infertility podcast helped Jordan know that there was a light at the end of the tunnel for her
  • How sharing her story changed Jordan’s infertility experience and brought healing
  • How Jordan and her husband selected their adoption agency after a lot of research
  • Jordan’s advice: What are the questions to ask to determine if an adoption agency is ethical?
  • Jordan’s advice for couples looking into infant adoption
  • How they pared down their expenses to save every penny to afford adoption
  • The hardest part of the adoption process was putting together the profile book; another difficulty was making space in their hearts for something that didn’t work out
  • The next steps for Jordan with either another adoption or trying again with their three remaining frozen embryos
  • The lowest point for Jordan was after the second miscarriage; it took some time for her to feel like smiling again
  • What it feels like to be so young and have two genetic miscarriages
  • The positive moment of meeting their daughter’s birth mom, which was the turning point in their journey
  • How relationships with friends changed for Jordan because many of them weren’t able to understand what she was facing
  • How infertility has changed Jordan: “I’ve abandoned my two-year plan. Now, I barely keep a six-month plan. Part of growing in this journey is learning to trust my own decisions and be agile in them when things don’t work out.”
  • Jordan’s advice to her past self: “You make deep, emotional, loving bonds with people to whom you aren’t biologically related all the time, like friends, in-laws, and your partner. Your child won’t be any different if they aren’t biologically related to you. Once you give a child the title of being yours, then the bond is there. Don’t let fear hold you back.”

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