This is the second episode in a series where I answer listener questions about my infertility journey, my life and background, the podcast, and more. (Click here to listen to Part 1 and here to listen to Part 3.) A special thanks to my friend and fellow infertility warrior Linda for playing guest host and being a fabulous interviewer.
What you’ll hear in this episode:
- The twins’ delivery on January 20, 2014, and then a funeral with no attendees
- Feeling like no one cared about us or our children
- The most painful reminder of the loss: an abundance of milk with no one to feed
- The darkness of grief and pain
- Eventually, back to part-time work
- April 2014: transabdominal cerclage surgery
- Another transfer, six months after the twins’ loss
- Two miscarriages in the year following the twins’ birth
- A retrieval cycle in April 2015, with only ONE viable embryo
- The lowest point of all: a negative beta test after transfer
- Looking for egg quality issues “because my eggs were crap!”
- A CoQ10 and DHEA regimen to improve egg quality
- In May 2015, the beginning of the Beat Infertility podcast
- The embryo transfer in June 2015 that became my daughter
- How “normal” life stopped for us
- Wearing my guilt, shame, and failure
- Pregnancy with my daughter and crazy bleeding issues
- The worst bleeding incident ever
- The sub-chorionic hematoma (SCH) with bleeding for 10 weeks
- At 24 weeks, “She has stopped growing”
- At 33 weeks, “She isn’t moving”
- At the hospital to get checked, “You know you’re in labor, right?”
- Aurora, born via emergency C-section with a disintegrated umbilical cord: 3 lbs. 6 oz.